A Spark by Innocent Mwatsikesimbe from The Vision, chapter 24

Before you judge a decision, look at what the person had to choose from. Innocent’s move is to “blame life for giving them bad options” rather than the chooser — and to note that fighting those options, or making new ones through action, takes willpower, courage and perseverance that isn’t always to hand.

His example is betrayal. Someone who has never had a close relationship may never have seen what trust is worth; to a person who valued it, betrayal would be senseless. Most broken trust, he thinks, comes from being unaware of how much trust is worth.

He can’t picture anyone choosing what they know to be bad. People always believe they are deciding rightly, however mistaken the belief. “Without a better option, what’s available right now seems best.” It isn’t absolution — creating better options through action is still the braver road — but it turns some of our blame into something more useful.